Unclean (not for the faint-hearted or weak of stomach)

After nearly nine months of genetically indefensible good luck, the small one has been ill.  It started as conjunctivitis a month ago, was found to be a viral ear infection which mutated into an upper respiratory tract infection but the last week it has become something more disturbing.  By which I mean not that it is any more serious in medical terms, just that the infection is now manifesting itself in the form of extreme clinginess (which is in itself quite sweet given that he has only just begun to acknowledge us as his favourite or at least most recognisable people) and a cough which is occasionally so violent it causes him to vomit copiously and with surprising force.

Having volunteered to bring the wailing boy downstairs to allow the Boy Wonder to enjoy the first shift of sleep, I am now typing this one-handed, at a glacially slow pace from my late-night post on the sofa which is festooned with towels, sheets, muslins and tea-towels in a desperate attempt to protect our soft furnishings from the liberal covering of Calpol streaked sick to which they would otherwise be subjected.  Our kitchen is awash (not too tired for puns - never too tired for puns) with laundry.  A small baby is capable of producing enough vomit in one sitting to necessitate changing the clothes of two adults, one child and a king sized bed, so there have been days when I have done more loads of laundry than I've had hours of sleep. However, the worst thing about it is that our usually cheerful and contented progeny has been transformed into a wailing, wilting little bundle of tiredness and dismay and that's making the tiredness feel even more desperate.

(As it turned out, this was the beginning of a long and frustrating process whereby the small one was ill, developed anaemia and had to be referred to the hospital, developed lactose intolerance and generally didn't do much in the way of sleeping for months on end. Fortunately, it was all over eventually and he is now the slightly over-zealous picture of rude health!)