Food shame

There are two food related things that make me ashamed of myself: Eating crisp sandwiches (which I have re-christened Chav-wiches to demonstrate that I know this is not an acceptable way to eat)which must be salt and vinegar crisps and nearly always feature when I am ill. It's as though I am anti-nourishing my body! Dropping food on my chest and then eating it - makes me feel like Bart Simpson in the future when he washes himself with a rag on a stick. Wholesome - mmmmmm!